Food Poisoning

Here’s how it went down.

Day 1: I order some Jus de Pomme in the evening. Given my nonexistent French vocabulary, I was kind of hoping for pomegranate juice, but I had an open mind. I received something that resembled coconut milk. I should have received apple juice, I now know. Anyhow, I drank it down.

I took a walk, then the exhaustion set in. Because I stayed up late the night before, I didn’t think much of it. I was asleep at a reasonable hour.

Day 2: Wake up feeling exhausted and sore, with a pounding headache. My joints hurt. In fact, my whole body hurts. Neither coffee nor breakfast alleviate the weakness and tiredness. Something is wrong.

I hop in the car and feel progressively worse during a morning drive. The main sensation resembles the flu. My muscles ache as though I had vigorously exercised the day before, but yesterday I did little more than walk. I also have a fever. By noon, I am alternating between sweating and shivering, and every bump in the road is agonizing. My stomach, however, feels fine.

Fading in and out of sleep, I have no energy. It feels like a really nasty case of the flu. Before it’s even dark, I need to get into bed. I have eaten little since breakfast, but I have no desire to eat or drink. I just want to lay still and let this pass. I fall asleep very early. Still no word from my stomach, though.

That night, my dreams are vivid and frightening. My body is still painfully sore, I sweat profusely but can’t get warm. I've had food poisoning before, and I recognize these symptoms.

Day 3: At some point during the night, my stomach lets itself be heard. It gurgles and groans, jarring me awake a few times. Then, the floodgates open. Montezuma’s revenge in all its explosive, pyrotechnic glory. It is ugly and overwhelming. Looks like it was the wrong night to stay in a $6-per-night hotel with a drop toilet without lights or toilet paper. I begin taking antibiotics I brought along in case this happened. If I was weak before, I’m basically paralyzed now.

I get out of bed about 12 hours after I went down, but I have no energy and can barely walk. In any event, I can’t stray too far from a toilet for long. I stop at a pharmacy for a battery of stomach medications and vitamins. When I take a bite of bread and try to drink some water, my stomach cries out in protest and the cramps set in. They are crippling. I can’t sit still but I can’t move either.

The day passes slowly as I lie here and there between visits to the toilet. It’s brutal. I fall asleep early again, feeling better at night than I did during the day. My sleep is interrupted by unpleasant visits to the throne. At least this one has a seat.

Day 4: I wake up feeling better. The aches and pains are gone, and only a small headache remains. My stomach is still a wasteland but my appetite is back. I feel a bit stronger and continue taking antibiotics and other stomach medicines. By evening, I’m smiling, moving around, and back in the saddle. (Literally. I rode a camel that evening.)

Day 5: No problem. Aside from some weakness and a still-nervous stomach, I’m feeling better. I eat a couple of full meals and participate in the day’s events. But by evening, I am completely exhausted again.

Day 6: The flu is back, just like it was at the beginning. Are we really going to revisit the whole cycle? The rather dim silver lining is that my stomach never returned to normal, so at least continued gastric distress won’t count as a relapse. I sleep all day, waking only to go to the doctor, which takes all the energy I have. He gives me an ultrasound or something like it and reports that I have food poisoning. I concur. Total cost for a same-day visit to a private stomach specialist in Morocco: $22.

Day 7: Regain a bit of strength and feel somewhat better. Sleep for most of the day. Eat a bit but not much.

Day 8: Finally I am more or less functional. My stomach, if not recovered, is starting to behave. The worst is past, and I can go back to regular life.

Important lesson: If your apple juice tastes like coconut milk, think twice before drinking it.